Wednesday, February 17, 2010

So You Want to be a SAHM

A friend is hearing the calls of SAHMhood. Maybe it's because her son is growing more engaging and reactive, and they did wait for him for a long time. Or maybe motherhood is really just transforming her into someone she never thought she'd be.

What does one say to someone like her that wouldn't be biased?

Ahh, but am sure she's heard all of it before, the pros and the cons. So I guess all I can say is the truth.


Money can be earned many different ways. A career can be established before a marriage, during, and even after the kids have gone to college. Success is measured many different ways. Two-income families are not necessarily more economically viable than a one-income one. Even people who have become redundant can reinvent themselves.

But children are only young once. They only need you this much for a short period of time. So if parents can give the present of their time to their kids, not just for a set hour or so every day, then I really hope they take it. Because it's a privilege that not many can enjoy, and it's a sacrifice with so many intangible rewards.


I have always gotten anxious over not earning as much money as I used to do, as much as I want to make.

And I have lamented about missing adult conversations, dressing up and having a real social life.

But I have never told a working mom that I wish I was back working. Usually, it's working moms that tell me that they wish they can be a SAHM too, even if only for a time.

That's how I know I am living a congruent life.


Prejudice Against SAHMs
In Praise of SAHMs


Heidi said...

I actually have been longing to be a SAHM ever since Adam came to our lives but there are just too many financial obligations on my shoulders right now that I can't afford to risk it... I would love to spend the whole day caring for my son and experiencing everything with him but for the moment, we would just have to make do with our evenings and weekends because, as much as I want to say "money is not a problem", it still is in our case so until then...

Mec said...

Heidi... I know that I am lucky in that respect, that... or we've just really set our expectations so low about other things :) But I know that many more households really need two incomes... or more, just to make ends meet...

JMom said...

I only stayed home with my third baby and I always regretted I didn't do it with the first two. It was the most rewarding experience of my motherhood. Well, except for the housework part. hehe!

Pero super bonding experience talaga when you're with your baby 24/7. Nicely said, Mec!

Mec said...

JMom :)

I know din na it's not for every woman... but it saddens me nga to hear so many women wishing out loud that they're with their kids more... I feel, if they just rearrange certain things in their lives, then it's more than possible...

plus... times have changed... I fear for kids now and I really hope more kids have more time with their parents, if only to give them a strong foundation of what love is, how it goes and feels..