Tuesday, April 6, 2010

Bullying in America, Bullying Here

A friend in the States is contemplating homeschooling because news of bullying in her country (with at least three kids committing suicide last March).

Even parents in the country have been reporting bullying on their kids. A friend even changed schools three times because her youngest was being bullied. And that is one of the reasons, and one of the rewards, of homeschooling.

But I really don't want to homeschool because I want my kids to avoid bullying. I want to homeschool because I want to mold his character as best I could so they'd grow up productive members of the society. And homeschooled kids do not exist in a vacuum. Bullying can still happen within the community, in sports meets, even maybe in family reunions.

And how do you avoid raising door mats or bullies? Where is that fine line?

Parents are typically scared most of their kids being bullied. So plans of enrolling their kids in self-defense classes are always a top strategy. But it's just as easy to raise an empowered child who is soooo empowered, he drives others crazy as well.

What even struck me the most about the news is how bullying has changed. Bullies have ganged up, gone subtle and logged online. It will really be harder for parents to detect these things because not only do we not have the energy to go through every site they go to, it would also be wrong. I mean, there's supervision and there's disrespect of their privacy.

How do you teach your child to come to you for help?
How do you teach your child to not attract bullies?
How do you teach your child to learn, even from other people's mistakes?
How do you teach your smart, beautiful child that she is not more important or special than others? That she doesn't have any entitlements?
How do you teach your child where to draw the line? That what's fun or harmless for him may really be hurtful to others?
How do you teach a child to handle peer pressure and lynch mob mentality?
How do you ensure that your child will have friends?
How do you teach your child to react better to adversities?
How? How? How?


Please also read the interview of Susan Klebold, the mother of the Columbine 'killer.'

Because it would indeed be wrong to always assume both bullies and bullied kids were not loved, or loved enough. There isn't just one victim when such tragedies happen.

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