Before the days of worrying about interest in cheap cigars and being hung over, I have the pressing problem of teaching my sons gentleness.
On one hand, I can't help but raise my eyebrow at the desire when I am given to fits of temper and I spank. I may not spank everyday nor scold everyday, but I am not always gentle.
But... if you except the times that I am compromised emotionally or the boys really need some physical reminding, I know I am gentle with them. I believe in the LAMBILOS approach (lambing, biro, haplos) and I make sure I take advantage of the times when my eldest isn't complaining about how rough and ragged my hands are.
So... it boggles me how they both think kicking each other, or bouncing a ball on someone's head... is loving. It amazes me how they'd wrestle until one or both of them cry, and how they both never seem to hear me when I remind them to be gentle.
Right now, I am thinking of a song to chant so I can remind them better... they respond to the packing away song, so I might as well use high notes when I'm feeling they're being too rough.
Then again, how will they establish their own pecking order and know the limits and boundaries of their physical space and strength... if I keep harping on them to be careful?
Heaven help me!